The funny fabulous males in my life...

I forget sometimes that I am the only girl around here. I get so used to being in "boy-world." Let me tell you ladies, boy-world can be so much more simple than girl-world. This week has been a lesson in it, and has given me the giggles more than once.

Baseball Camp.
I have two children that are VERY into sports. They watch sports. They play sports. They talk about sports. sports. sports. sports. Get the idea? So after the first half of summer being here - and ALL OF US BEING IN THE HOUSE 24 HOURS A DAY - whew, exhausting just to think it, the MAMA (that would be me) gets on-line and finds some CAMPS to ship the little darlings off to.

Baseball is the current passion, and U.T. (my alma mater) has Spartan Baseball Camp. Excellent. It is from 9am to 4pm. The boys are outside ALL DAY - learning baseball skills all morning, lunch, quick swim, then play baseball games all afternoon. My idea of hell. Their idea of heaven. Goodie. I sign them up.

Day One. Jeff takes Blake and Jeffrey to camp. Brantley is smart enough to figure out that 7 hours in the sun =hot, sticky, sweaty, and he declines to attend. Brilliant child. Andrew is in summer school, so out the door the two jocks go.

Jeff takes them on the first day. I am a bit nervous about leaving Blake (who is 7) all day, but figure big brother is with him and the camp was stupidly expensive - losing my kid would be bad for business, so we go for it. Jeff gets home and I have a million questions - does it look cool, was it safe, did you tell them about Blake's peanut allergy, where do I pick them up, what was the drop off procedure and my list goes on and on. Jeff finally says, "honey, I pulled in the circular drive. I got out. There were two dudes sitting a table with a clipboard that looked in charge. They checked Blake and Jeffrey in, tossed Blake's epi-pen in a medical box, and told the boys which dug-out to report to. I got in the car and came home."

So, I go to pick them up. I go the circular drive. There is a concession stand and the moms have begun to swarm. Blake is buying his 12th gatorade for the day. I ask the guy if I need to sign Blake out. "Oh, no, just take him." Just take him??? The guy gives my mini-van driving-self a look like, lady, if you want him and he will go with you take him. But, he politely says, "We are keeping a close eye on them."

Now, we go to a LARGE church where the security is TIGHT. You have to have your claim check or someone is going to pat you down and take your life history before giving you your kid, so this new method of drop off and pick up is a little strange to me. The camp averages 30-80 kids a week and all the baseball players (or it seemed like all of them) from the college team are helping out, coaching, etc. So, the adult to child ratio is HIGH, but still.

The boys LOVED it. They had Wendy's for lunch on day one. Pizza on day two. They are playing SO hard. It is awesome. I think because it is ALL GUYS. The camp is run by guys. The coaches are guys. The kids are all guys. IT is a swarm of male hormones. There is not a mama in sight to baby you or give you sympathy. They are there to play.

Blake also gets a brush with fame. Ray's player, BJ Upton was there practicing batting. Blake had his Upton T-shirt on! So, Upton comes over - and tells him that he likes his shirt! Talks directly to Blake and talks to him again today. It was way cool. I also thought that if I was a baseball "star" - really nothing would be cooler than some little guy to be wearing a shirt with my name on it. More male bonding.

So, today I ask Blake if the coaches know his name - or if they wear name tags. "No." Blake tells me. So, what do they call you? I ask him.

Get this.

"Dude."

Me:"What do they call the other boys."

Wait for it...
"
"DUDE!

Hilarious. How he knows they are talking to HIM, I have zero clue, but he does not seem to mind, so, whatever. Blake looked at me like I was asking the strangest questions EVER - who cares about nametags when you get to play baseball ALL DAY LONG???

I go across the street after picking up Blake (which takes all of 30 seconds because all the boys are waiting out front to get in their mom's mini-vans) to pick up my niece from drama camp (run by women - lots of mom involvement). There is a huge back-up of traffic line and security cards. I am more at home with this procedure, and a bit happier with it.

It took over 20 minutes. Dude. Maybe the guys are onto something?