Just the way you are...

So, if you keep up via facebook land, you know that Andrew is the ring-bearer in Jordan & Kara's wedding tomorrow. (www.karaandjordan.com). A precious couple that adore our boys - but especially Andrew.

When I started this blog, it was because I had just found out that Andrew had Downs. I was terrified and overwhelmed. So many people were so sweet and supportive and wanted, well, to know. Know what? I think, honestly, just to know. Like, hey, what is it really like. When I read my early posts, they are very raw. And sometimes still are. But more than anything, a deep appreciation for life - all life - and how precious it all really is.

God has shown us great things about himself through Andrew. He revealed some ugliness that I had in my own heart, and, in only ways God can do has made something beautiful with it all. I did not feel "blessed" to have a special needs child. I did not think I was some great person that God knew would rise to the challenge. What I do know is that I am better because of it. My expectations have turned to how can I help my children be who God wants them to be - not who I want them to be. And for that, I will be forever thankful.

So, tonight was special for us. You have this fear that people won't want to be around your child because he is different. Nothing could be further from the truth. Jeff and I packed Andrew up to go get his tux and head off to the rehearsal. It is very seldom that the two of us get to be with ONE of the boys, so we were excited about that in itself. We get to the tux place and I go back to the changing room with Andrew. He tells me that he does not want to wear the tux. Great start, I think. But I tell him he will look soooo handsome - and he gets to wear cool black pants, and he grudgingly agrees to change. He was the cutest thing ever - and happily exclaimed, "I sooooo handsome!" - and we took pictures with our iPhones!

sample and teaser for tomorrow:


Fast forward to church. He easily makes friends with the wedding party. Does a great job at practice. Doles out the high-fives and we are off to the rehearsal dinner. After dinner, Kara & Jordan have their "last" dance as a non-married couple - a somewhat first dance since you can't really rock out in the Baptist Church reception. And as the music starts, Andrew crawls in my lap. "Dance with me," he tells me. We dance in the chair since we can't really join the bride to be and groom on their solo dance, but the words to the music play...

"I would not leave you in times of trouble - we never could have come this far - I take you just the way you are... Don't go changing - to try and please me -I don't want clever conversation - I never want to work that hard (ooo-ooo) I just want someone that I can talk to - I want you just the way you are. I say I love you - and that's forever - and this I promise from my heart - I couldn't love you any better - I love you just the way you are..."

And in that moment - of his darling face staring at mine - his fat hands on my cheeks - I was reminded that this is Andrew's greatest gift. So, if you read my blog because you want to "know" what its like to have a child with Downs - what it is like to be Andrew's mom - his friends - his family. It is this - I love him just the way he is. He loves me just the way I am. It is the closest to God's love that I think we can get. Andrew wants to give love and be loved - not a whole lot more - and not a whole lot less.

We love you just the way you are, precious boy - and are thankful that you love us and get to be ours.

Thank you, Kara & Jordan, for allowing Andrew to be a part of your special day. We can't wait for tomorrow!

Ok, so have to tag on some videos. After the slow song, the beat picked up and Andrew hit the dance floor. How many 4 year olds can get a group of 10 hot college girls to dance with them? I know one. Oh, and Jordan, you better watch out - Andrew spent the evening patting your bride's butt and pulling her out onto the dance floor!