I have become that terrible blogger. Sometimes I wonder why it has been months - then I look at my kids, my husband, my jobs, blah blah blah, and I get a reality check - there are only so many hours - and I want to cherish each one. But, I like to blog. It is like cleaning out a closet. It helps me lay the pieces of my life on the table, take a look, and try and make sense of them. What needs to go - what needs to stay? Or, blogging forces me to push life through the God-filter of my faith, and rest that He will make sense of it all one day. I also like to blog because it is a record of where I have been - and I pray that it gives some hope. Lots of reasons to blog - as many as there are as to why sometimes there is JUST NOT TIME. But, that is all rambling...
Any-hoo...lots to share and tell you...not sure where to begin...too late to go back in time and try and catch you up...so let's just jump in - shall we? Run, now, fetch yourself a drink and come back. We'll catch up. A nice chat. Are you back? I have a diet coke as well. Goodie, let's chat.
1) Kids. They are awesome. Fabulous. Funny. Amazing. Great ages. Great stages. All good. Jeffrey is 11 - 5th grade - great student, great brother, straight A's. A total over-achiever, rule-loving first born. Jeff and I can't relate, but we adore him. He is now into "my sports and school" and has put music on the shelf for a moment. He is almost as tall as me - wears the same size shoe - and his hands are the same size. One day soon, I am going to be the smallest in the house.
Blake - is riding a bike without training wheels. He has countless energy and questions. If it is in his head, it is out his mouth. The honesty is refreshing. They were all in trouble this am. We were talking about it tonight, and he said, "yeah, when you get mad, it makes me want to ignore you." I almost spit water out my nose. He also announced to me today that Andrew had Down Syndrome. Ummm, yeah, I got that memo. I asked him what that meant. He told me, "He is smaller than us - will always be smaller - it takes him longer to do things - and he has hopeless needs." Hopeless needs??? What. Where did you get this info? He tells me that his daddy told him. I asked what "hopeless needs" meant. He told me that it meant that he had needs. But, we all have needs. And then he says, "so, mom, is he special?" And I told him that all my boys were special - that we were all special to God - but, yes, there were things that were different and special about Andrew - just like there were things that were different and special about him. But, this is where it got good. All 3 little ones were in the car. Andrew was in the middle row - the B's in the back. I tell the B's that Andrew needs time, but he will get it. I also throw in some medical info because that is how I roll, but I literally saw the light go on in their heads when I said, "but, boys, you know why Andrew has done so well - and what the doctors and teachers say the best thing he has going for him is???" I had them hooked at this point, and I tell the B's that they are the best roll models Andrew has. The light is on, and they start telling me all the things Andrew knows and can do - "Mom, Andrew knows what 1+1 is - and he knows what 2+2 is!" I was proud, and it was sweet. They had grace. Andrew's needs brought out grace in them. Blake announced that he was going to work on not yelling at Andrew. Brantley announced that he did not yell at Andrew anyway. And then we left and went to Walgreens. A day in the life...
Brantley. He won't ride a bike and is not interested - even with training wheels. He is almost 7. I'm not sure what to do about that. The kid can write in cursive better than I can. He drew a game board on a piece of paper - made dice out of paper and tape - with little men drawn on paper that would fit in the dice. It was well thought out and quite impressive. He is a lego machine and a "master" of Mario Cart and the DS games. He is self-contained and adorable. He can wink at you and melt your heart. Ladies, beware.
Andrew. Yummy. Sassy. He is in his last year of his little special needs class and we are working on his transition into kindergarten next year. My baby. In kindergarten. Wow. He loves school. He doesn't have potty accidents at school anymore. He rarely ever has a pee accident. The poop thing still is a work in progress. But THREE times recently, he has gone, done his #2 business ON HIS OWN and then let us know about it. We actually took a picture the first time and sent it to his grandparents. The simple things in life. Andrew does things on his own time. He loves his family, school and life. He will sing you Jesus Loves Me if you would like. He loves doggies and cars and trucks. His brothers gave him big hugs before bed tonight. Good stuff.
Other stuff...
work has been a zoo! My Heart & Home stuff is still in the Boutique Shops in Palm Harbor and I am still doing the operations stuff at Movex. We did a trade show in Vegas in early March (my first trip there) and we have another convention in Mississippi next week. Jeff went to Vegas too (with my dad and brother as well). I have pictures. I'll try and post them.
April brings Easter and the celebration of the resurrection of Jesus! I love Easter - the new life in Christ. A new start. A new beginning. I like Spring.
A major drag is that someone came and washed all my shorts in hot water and dried them in the dryer. The boys started baseball this past weekend, and I went to throw on a pair of shorts - that were tight! Next pair - tight! Dang it. Back to the gym and the protein. The winter has been too long. Or, I have just eaten too much. Or, exercised too little. Bummer. Why can't life be easy???
Hubbie is great. We have an amazing goup of couples we meet with each month from our church. We are thankful for them and what God is doing in all of our lives.
Ok, so if you have read this far, then you deserve the down and dirty scoop on our lives. Not sure how to say this - or break it to you - but, as you may know, we were infertile for years. We have done IVF 4 times (invitro). When we did our last cycle (=twins), we had one little embryo left over that was frozen. "She" who we call totsicle has been in the deep freeze for the past 7 years, but we are going through the steps to put the embryo back. We ran into some delays last week. My hormones and cycles have gone funky recently, but you don't need all the details. We would appreciate any prayers on our behalf - for timing and God's best for us.
Trying to "unpack" my emotions about this embryo bring up so may things - which is why I blog in the first place. So, here it is...
I am terrified it will not work.
I am terrified it will work.
and that is just the start of the list.
Deep emotion.
Deep thoughts.
A bigger God.
I'll keep you posted. Really ;)
